Today's post comes from something we talked about in my Crisis Counseling class today. I figured I'd walk you through the same thing we did, and give my thoughts on the topic.
First, pull out a blank sheet of paper.
Next, write your name in big bold letters right across the middle of the page.
Then, crumple up the paper into the smallest wad possible. Really scrunch it up and kinda beat it into the smallest shape you can.
Then, try to straighten the paper back to it's perfect original shape. No wrinkles, no rough edges...the exact state it existed in before you squished it up.
In case you didn't notice, it's absolutely impossible to do. Once you've crumpled the paper up it will always have the scars of injury upon it. Even taking a hot iron to it will not completely restore it to it's former glory. That piece of paper represents our lives, and every tragedy that we have faced, regardless of how big or small it seemed at the time. There is nothing that we come through wholly untouched, and we are never the same after having undergone such things. For better or worse we have been changed. We may heal and and come to a place of understanding, but those scars will always be there either physically, mentally, or emotionally. It's interesting to think how the traumas we face in our lives impact us and influence us drastically, especially if not properly faced and cared for. This is not meant to discourage us and cause us to think that we'll never get over something traumatic that happens, but just to help us understand that having undergone that situation becomes a part of who we are. Just as the paper is still useful for many things, it can still be written on, used to make a paper airplane, pretty much everything it was useful for before, we too can come through trauma and still live up to our full potential as human beings, although that may ultimately look different than what we had originally planned.
Sorry if today is a downer post, it's not meant to be. I somehow felt reassured by this discussion in class; like although I have all these painful emotional scars that will never fully go away, I'm still going to be able to deal with them and look past them to have a full productive life. Who knows, maybe I'll even be able to help someone else dealing with the same kinds of things. I'm really looking forward to taking this Crisis Counseling class this semester on one level, but on another it's going to be like "putting your emotions through a meat grinder." This is the advanced warning, that some of my overflow from the class may end up being dumped into the blogosphere :)